Everyone Leaves

Everyone leaves, it's a fact of life. People move away, people die. You can't stop it from happening; these are inevitable actions.
But you, leaving me when I'm still here, is a fact that I can change. A fact you could change. If you cared enough to do so. I want to fix it, do you?
You don't seem to care if we're together or apart. You've got your new friends, why should you need me? I'm not as important, not as much fun, as them.
So you leave. And here I am, left without one of my closest friends. Because I was too scared to try and stop you, and you didn't care enough to stop yourself.
I've lost friends before, they meet new people and forget I exist. It's been a fact of my life since I was little. It used to hurt so much, to be put behind the back burner in someone's mind. But over the years it's hurt less and less. I've pulled away from people so it won't hurt as much as it used to. If you don't get close to them, it can't hurt when they leave you. Right?
Wrong. It still hurts. It's just a different kind of hurt. When you're close and they leave, it's like ripping a band-aid off a wound. The abrupt distance is painful, but will subside. When you're not close to them, however, the pain is like a bruise. Dull, almost unnoticeable. But it stays around for a long time. The feeling of not having someone close enough to tell your secrets, your fears; no one there to help battle the demons you keep in your soul. Sure, you may not feel the sudden heartache of them leaving you, but you will always feel the throbbing of having no one on your side.
I thought this time it would be different. We're close, but not too close. The grey intermediate between the heartache and the throbbing. I thought being in that area would make the pain less intense, less apparent.
Turns out, I was wrong. The grey part hurts the worst. There's the dull pain of not being super close, but when you left the heartache was almost unbearable. The pain is always there, with the added burst of pain. And I don't know how to fix it. If I even can fix it. If you even want to fix it.
Have I lost my chance at being your friend? Have you replaced me with someone more exciting, more interested? Someone better than I ever could be? I've been replaced time and time again, but I never thought you would replace me. Guess the grey area is the worst place to put a friend. That's the area where you get hurt the most.